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Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Silent Flirting: What Your Body Language Is Saying About You, Part 5

By Joseph Matthews

I wrote about how gestures function in the role of flirting in the last article of this series.

This time I'll talk about your facial expressions and how they fit into your strategy.

Now when most people think of facial expressions they usually conjure up images of Jim Carrey making a silly face, or some other comedian perhaps.

Believe it or not, the facial expressions we display take on a powerful role in what we signal to the other person. And conversely, how they see us as well!

Understand the importance here - the look on your face can be very off putting, and it will have NOTHING to do with your actual looks. If you scowl naturally, or come across as "expressionless", you can scare others away.

It's always a good idea to take time to understand yourself. Look in the mirror. Get a handle on your natural expressions, and see how those can be of advantage (or disadvantage) to you.

Let's focus on some very important expressions that are much like the gestures from the last article.

A well known expression is the eyebrow raise. It's used to acknowledge another person from across a room, particularly when they can't say hello.

You can try this with a stranger. It seems like it would be awkward, but actually, the idea is to create some confusion on their part. They'll be wondering who you are!

It creates an opportunity to enter into conversation, but beware. It can backfire and end things before you can even begin.

If the person you do this with finds you attractive, it generally will work, however. It will probably be evident in their facial expression.

The big issue here, and one that most men run into, is that facial expressions are the most common way that someone expresses deceit when it comes to conversation. We look at each other's faces most of the time, so it's evident that is the first place we try to hide our feelings at.

False expressions can hide our true feelings. Take for example, the social smile. While useful, it's annoying to have it done to us. However, there are signs, beneath the surface, that will show us the truth!

In the next part, I'll continue with facial expressions and show you not only WHY someone would give out false ones, but also HOW to use them to our advantage! - 20611

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